20091130

s h h . . .



i'm struggling to hear my own voice lately . seems as though everyone else's voice is overpowering my own . i guess i'm so delusional & aloof that the ppl closest to me feel as though they have to protect me . i must be so lost in my own world that everyone feels they have to talk incessantly to get me to listen . they see something wrong in me that i obviously don't see in myself . they know what's best for me because i obviously don't know what's good for myself .

i'm drowning in a sea of voices that don't belong to me . hitting my head on the ceiling . searching for a break through . something new , something right . i'm not sure if it's here in this place . this body . this mind state . a little silence would do me good .

wishful thiiiiinkiiiin' . . . like sly says .

currently getting a grip .
i'm lucky to be loved .
i'm lucky to be saved from myself .